2009 23/10

Obsess much?

I’ve written [here] before about how Abbi has begun to notice the difference between how mom and dad look.  I giggle about how she would say that daddy had a “tail”.  I’m even giggling right now.  But don’t worry folks, my day has come.

A few weeks ago Abbi started pulling at the neckline of my shirt, asking “what are those?”  Awe, geesh! I kind of thought we would just breeze by this topic.  But alas, the questions just kept coming.

So we had the talk again about how girls have ‘girl-parts’ and boys have ‘boy-parts’.  Then she asks, “But when will I get boobs mom?  I’m a girl.”  So then we had the talk about how someday her body will look like mine, when she’s a grown-up.  She’s satisfied with that answer, for now.

However, she likes to ask the question often, “Mom, what are those?”  She knows the answer but she just likes to ask the same question over and over again.  Every time we read a certain book she always asks me what an eel is, even though I’ve told her time and time again.  I have no idea why she does this, just the age I guess.

Then she likes to pat them.  She pats my boobs!  There’s nothing more uncomfortable than my 3 year old patting my boobs.  Ok, maybe if a stranger in the supermarket was patting my boobs, that might be a bit more uncomfortable.  Seriously though, what do I do?  I don’t want my girls to feel uncomfortable with their bodies, especially as they change but the boob-patting needs to stop!

For now I’ve told her that it’s ok to ask questions but we need to keep our hands to ourselves.  She seems to be ok with that for now.

I knew that having kids meant we’d be having all these kind of talks eventually.  I just didn’t think through how I would handle them.  I want my girls to come to me with everything, every question.  But I’m a pretty private person.  I’m pretty modest.  And I am very easily embarrassed.  I guess that means it’s time for me to come out of my shell a little more.  After all, I did just talk about my boobs!

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  • loved this! we’ve been here with Jessica already too and even Oliver – with the boob patting that is. oh man!

  • This is really funny. Abbi gave me a pat when I was babysitting. She asked, “What are these?”

    I said, “Well, you should ask your mom about that.”

    She gave me this great look like she couldn’t believe I didn’t know the answer to this question. She finally said, “those are your boobs.”

    It made me laugh. She was probably thinking, “Woah… who is this crazy lady? She doesn’t even know what boobs are.”

    Later she looked uneasy when I drank out of a glass glass. She told me to be careful b/c my mom & dad would be upset if I broke it. I guess she wasn’t sure I could handle glass. I must of lost all street credit when I failed the boob test.

  • My 20 month old has taken to patting my boobs too! More embarassing when one of my close friends came over the other day (she just had a baby and is quite, uhhh, “full?”) Amber went over, patted hers, and went “ooooo!!!” LOL!! Oh the joys of toddlers!!!

  • The story is precious. You are doing the right thing. Answer her directly and honestly without fear or embarrasment. If you don’t, she will think this topic is wrong to talk abouot with you later in life. Further…tell her no more than she asks. Which means be sure what she is asking. She will question whatever she needs to know as long as communication is open.

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