2010 09/02

Mommy Confessions: Who taught you to say that?

It’s one of the best moments as a parent — hearing your child’s first word!  Especially if it is some version of “mom”!  We spend so much of their first year or so trying to get them to say words, words that we can understand, words that make us proud.  Then we spend the next 10 years trying to get them to be quiet.  And, then, the following decade is spent trying to get them to talk to us again, or so I’m told.  Ah, the rewards, the joys, the frustrations, the headaches!

I am knee deep in the second of those three phases.  The “please, just stop talking for five minutes” phase.  The “can you PLEASE speak in a quieter voice” phase.  The “if you continue to say ‘mom’ I’m going to throw my head through a brickwall” phase.  Oh yes, that phase.

My girls were early talkers.  We didn’t overly push them to talk, they just picked up words quickly.  This means that it has not been quiet in my house for 3.5 years.  And, ironically enough, they are loud talkers!  Thankfully we’ve never had any of those “my kid just said ‘oh shit’ in front of the in-laws or pastor” moments but we do have plenty of “seriously, who did she learn that word from?” and “why did we teach her that”  moments!

So, here are a few of the phrases I wish I could eliminate from my girls’ vocabularies!

Me: “Zoe, please don’t chew on my phone.”

Zoe: “Why mom? Why mom? Why mom? Why mom?”

Me: “Because I asked you not to. We don’t chew on phones.”

Zoe: “But why mom? Why mom? Why mom?”

The funny thing is that I don’t mind my kids asking me questions.  I love their curiosity and hunger to know more about things about them.  However, I cannot stand the constant and pointless questions!  On to number 2…

Me: “Zoe, what do you have in your mouth?”

Zoe: “Huh?”

Me: “What do you have in your mouth?”

Zoe: “Huh?”

Me: “Abbi, can you see what your sister has in her mouth?”

Abbi: “Huh?”

The worst part about this one is that I totally answer them when they say “huh?” so I’m just feeding the behavior.  I don’t mean to answer them time and time again, it’s just habit. And it frustrates my husband to no end!

This next one is completely my doing.  Taking 100% of the blame on this one!

Me: “Zoe, where is your blanket?”

Zoe: “No idea.”

I would often (ok, apparently more than often) say to Abbi, when she would ask me where her toys were, “Abbi, I have no idea where your toys are.  They are not my responsibility.”  I never realized how annoying it was until that is the response you get from your 22 month old with every question you ask her!  Go FIND YOUR BLANKET!

And the last, for now…

Zoe: “Sure potty mom! Sure potty!”

That is the way Zoe tells us she has to go potty.  I have no idea why she says it this way or where it came from or why she just can’t say “Go Potty!” or even just “Potty!”  But she adds that freaking “sure” on to it every time and, after hearing it a hundred times each day, well…you just don’t want to hear it again!  There’s probably more behind that frustration but that is for another Mommy Confession!

What words do your kids say that drive you crazy? And are you going to admit that they got those words from you?

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