2011 17/03

The “F” word

I knew that by adding to our family, by having a second or third child, that we would eventually fight the battle of sibling rivalry.  No matter what the age difference or if you have kids that are the opposite sex, they are going to argue about one thing or another.  I just never knew how annoying and ridiculous it would be!

I understand the arguing over who gets to play with the newer Barbie doll or who gets to sit next to mom at the restaurant.  What I don’t get is the arguing over who gets their dinner plate first, when they are being served mere seconds apart.  Or who gets to say prayers first at night or who gets their face washed first.  Honestly, it is only mere seconds or maybe a minute between who gets it first and who gets it second.  But it’s all about that “F” word — FIRST!

Oh how it drives me crazy!  I think I would understand more if it were something absolutely fabulous or if the one who didn’t get to go first had to wait days before it was their turn, but this is not the case.  They are fighting over who gets served their dinner first…the same casserole that I will spend the next hour telling them they need to actually eat or at least try!

I’m not exactly sure how to combat this.  I’ve asked them not to do the whole “ME FIRST! ME FIRST! ME FIRST!” thing.  I’ve scolded them for doing it.  And now, if one of them asks to go first, they get to go last. If one of them gets frustrated because they didn’t get to go first then they have to wait even longer before they get their turn.

I wish I could say that it is working but we still fight the battle of the “FIRST”.  Again, I just don’t understand it!

Do you fight the battle of the “FIRSTS” in your house?  Did you figure out a secret weapon to end that battle?

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  • Shannon Follett

    YES! We have gone through the “F” word many times over the years. It is the most annoying thing to hear, over and over again. We tried age order and charts and it just didn’t work at first. Then, we started telling them, whoever asks for something first, goes LAST! After a few days of going last and some tears, the “F” word was pretty much obsolete. We still implement it today, if we need too. But charts and age order are working much better now. Good luck!

    On a side note, Talon is beautiful! Many congrats to you, Tim and the girls!

  • Repeat after me: “it’s just a stage”.

  • Wow, I feel like I wrote this. And my girls are only one and three. It has to get easier right? I am doing all of the same things and nothing is working. I also try to lose at lots of things or go last to demonstrate that life isn’t a race.

  • Hmmm…well, I can’t say that it gets any easier but maybe we just get used to it or it loses it’s irritating quality amongst the other chaos of life. Also, I’ve actually rewarded one of the girls for going last before just to try to prove my point that being first isn’t always best. That just resulted in the “THAT’S NOT FAIR MOM!” issue.

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